Called dr tong during break tym for them ytd. n tis woman i assume is wking dere as nurse, kp askin mi y i wan find tt dr. i oso nt findin her wad 4 tell her. but i did la, cos i scared she hanged my phone. den her tone was lk, so fierce or rather bad attitude tone la. say closed now call back at 2.30pm. i tell u i managed contact dr tong, i sure complaint her la, say i kena scared by his nurse( i listen lk auntie's voice, lol), don dare call back.lol

Today went dwn to suntec city wif bryan to mit the suppliers. I mean hw cum suntec starbucks so many de. cant even find the right 1, lol. but we managed to find la aftwards.(walked v long leh, cos suntec the walkway stretch so long, den turn here n dere)Sad, Bryan gg off soon. den i stressed la, if in charge of sales booths gt alot things do, den if the non sales booths oso i in charged aft he gone, sure die la. cos he has the ability but nt me la.lol. Hope my team who can assist mi la, cos sure at least nid another 2 or 3 ppl de.

Stressed, busy and sian all the way...

Big eyebags=.=

Went for appt ytd for my blood test result. Dr Law said other than RA, i hab gt tis lupus oso. i mean hw cum so suay, kena till 2 diseases. no choice, medication... n gt to be back 4 another blood test n another appt nx nx wk. sian... have been gg back to TTSH a lot of tym liao. n haven called dr tong yet. been lazy...

Today had team building games for EMRS teams. ermm our gp scored the least pts n eventually gt to do forefeet la, but in e end don hab leh, im nt sure if we'll be doing it on mon or wad. hope they 4gt. lol. e captain ball game, played wif team 2, n 1 of e gals (if any1 rmb e ms freshie in 2007 fr AF)in e team was sayin n complaining rite in front of us, wad y e guys in our team were playin lk basketball whr they throw e ball to so far, can wad, cannot meh? dere's no specific rules for captain ball bah... cos she said bout wad 3 feet away or sth. duno y she confused captain ball wif netball... n den kenny or whoever block tt gal, n she was lk shouting, gt away fr mi or sth. =.=

today duno y played so badly. mb 2 long dint ex n play netball liao, all my skills lk go haywire. n when there were tym bryan n kenny passed e ball to mi, i turned ard n dint c tt, den its lk e ball went off or sth, meaning i dint gt hold of e ball la. so its act... i duno la, but i did reali badly today. cos i could hab performed beta. mb its my rheumatoid arthritis, i lose my confidence or mb i cant reali response tt well. im nt 2 sure myself. but fr today, i shld hab exercise more nx tym, cos today come hm, lk e leg muscle pain sia. i tink is oso partly bcos of run 2 much, esp fr e island game la, its diff to catch e guys la, they can definitely outrun us gals, n its lk even those fat fat type oso can la. lol. reali tired n sweatin fr all e games la...

Fr e day i entered EMRS, damn bz la. rdshow n events aft 1 another. today started doin sourcing. mi n bryan went dwn for e stk return aft mr chong called us. 2th july gt tep stars awards, den soon aft, gt travel n green fair on 10, 11th july. gg die le la, stressed... duno hw yeeling managed to survive... lol

Ppl oways say god is fair
But really?
So y m i left to suffer tis way?
I don gt it...
But i hope every single day shall be a happy day for me...

Fri nite received a sudd call fr TTSH. Omg... e appt is pushed up to nx sat instead. but i alr applied e leave on 2/7. nvm i shall rest at hm on tt day. its said tt e test reports r out n e result is abnormal or sth. so e Dr wanna c mi urgently. mb there r 2 much antibodies in my body or sth. but durin my 1st test at amk polyclinic, its lk no prob leh, cos e dr dere dint say anyth bout it. hw cum 2nd test at TTSH den gt prob.. mb TTHS more professional, cos i oni took e blood n urine test, n its alr costing bout 150 bucks alr. i tink e nx appt nid tak another blood n urine test, cos i have wif mi e forms attached tgt w e nx appt.

n e med im takin nw don reali gt much effects yet. mus lk w8 for a few wks 1st. tis sulfasalazine med is lk can control e process of e disease by reducing e inflammation but den its lk nt much use when it comes to reducing e pain of e inflammation. so nw i can juz "ren" e pain, cos e pain at e arm is getting mre acute sumtym.

Juz hab to w8 wad e Dr is gg to tell mi on sat...

Had rdshow in sch ytd. damn tiring.. was nt as successful as expected for our team. today field trip, pc show at suntec city. alot of ppl, damn crowded. n dere was tis 6 lvl high. n i gt tis ht phobia. esp when u luk dwn fr e escalators leadin up to e 6th floor. if someone reali wanna commit suicide, i tink jumped dwn fr tt escalators either sure die de, if nt e bones sure break de. lol, jk... but reali tired aft tt, wif all those walkings n squeezings. took 133 hm, n it ended up it took mi bout an hr for e trip hm. (juz e bus trip oni)

yup, n for my team, frankly speaking, i don reali... my teammates. lol. i fil tt im easy gg la, so act nt much prob. its oni tt, sumtym when u tok to dem, they juz lk ignored u, or don ans u. i fil lk im talking to a wall or ghost sumtym. i tink tts basic manner or sth. shld ans when some1 tok to u rite.. n tt happens alot of tym n im fed up wif it. don reali fil lk talkin to dem liao.

sian... our 8 ppl team is divided into 2 sub gps n im gp wif e so-called nt so en2 ppl. so who's to lead? die our gp... sian... but i hope if every1 done his or her part shld be ok, if nt lk e previous 1st mini rdshow, so disorganised. i tink my A s gone, cos of e supervisors'commments... nw i can oni aim for B, but i hope still gt hope to gt A la, if e behind thingy we all did reali reali WELL! Juz take 1 step at a tym nw.. Heehee =.=

Went for my appt at TTSH ytd, so no choice took an mc. Dr Law cnf i hab tis rheumatoid arthritis. went for blood test n urine test agn. hab to be back dere aft 3wks agn for these tests (another appt). im so scared of needles nw, esp e blood test. Haiz.. n tis stup disease cant be CURED!! tts wad e dr said, can oni be controlled. n its lk too much white blood cells attacking my immune system or its lk systemic autoimmune disorder that causes the immune system to attack the joints. If i don eat e med to control, den my joint or bones will be kena "eaten" up by e white blood cells. Since it cant be cured, might hab to eat med for life long... i don1 it... i reali cant imagine a 18 yrs old person eating med 4 e rest of her life. i hope i oni nid to eat for at most a few yrs enuf. cos or else duno wad will happen to my kidneys all tt if i took 2 much med. *sob** n e medical fees s****!!! 200 plus for juz a visit.. damn cosy la... reali cant sick but can die in sg.. haha... Oh ya, haven called up Dr tong to tell him my condition yet. mb fri when im abit free.

stressed sia, cum back today. all those thingy for rdshow tml. damn bz... went off at 6 plus but our team haven yet finished. hab to be back sch earlier tml to settle stuff. n e mc haven settle yet. sianz... cant find ms tan aft sch to sign so cant gif it to pem yet. try it tml, but shall be real bz tml.

Hope tml rdshow shall be a success. (cos im 1 of e cashiers). hope everyth goes well, LOL.

I wld nv believe tis until someone i knw told mi tt e life inside e police stn before bailing out can be so torturing n pathetic. 3 pathetic meals per day plus a dark little cell, being locked up wif a stupid smelly toilet bowl. i tot tt oni applies n r meant for prisoners hu r alr convicted, but neverthless, it do happens to ppl hu r waiting for a bail out. hw can they be treated lk a prisoner alr when they r not yet 1? i hab heard stories abt some police do abused their authority by beating e person up for duno wad reason. mb they hab to retort to tis to make u confess e crimes (even when u did nt do it). Yup.. or hw can they complete their report which is needed to be writen up n handed up to the seniors. It was even worst when u enter e stn, n found out vulgar flying every where in e air.( fr e polices, can u imagine tt?) i hab oways regard police as a very "wei da", professional job, but... it seems tt they r being make out so nicely which seems not be e truth. *disappointment...

These few days had been running to n fro fr amk to woodlands. woa... tt day went to c Dr Tong. He wrote mi a letter of referral asking e polycinic to refer n recommend mi to a hospital for specialist check-up. n den he asked mi kp him updated. oh i min he's a v successful, those "dai dai liang yi" de dr, den gt tis kind of xin to care for e patients, hmm... he dint choose e wrong occupation, cos he's caring, lol. But he told mi to go on mon n i hab been slcakin all this while n tml is alr FRI! Oh dear..

ytd went to ask god (wif bro n aunty). quite a long queue, cos i took e queue no. 18. n dere r quite alot of ppl queuein behind n its alr lk 9 plus in e nite alr. when it was my turn, i was so looking 4ward to knw wad EXACTLY happened to mi for e last few mths. y m i suffering lk tis? but e ans e "guan yin" gave mi was"its nth, u tink too much." i don reali gt wad she min, did she min tt bcos i tink 2 much, tts y i had pains all over my body. aunty said its bcos my blood inside my body too hot, den "burn" until my bones or sth, lol. but indeed, my body temp is higher than most ppl. mb heaty inside, i duno. so reached hm at bout 11pm ytd nite aft e visit.
Rest 1 day, tml mus chiong agn... go polyclinic.. mus w8 up at 6 plus in e morn. lk so kiashu lk tt, go dere fight w those ah pek, ah ma, wif e queue. but cos of convenience la, at least mum fang gong le can acc mi go. cos all those wad fixed appt thingy i duno.

sch term gg start le, duno wad day e hospital will arranged mi on. cos if during TEP time, abit troublesome leh, wif all those leave system... *blurr...